Four Heavenly Months Old

​Today you’re four Heavenly months old, Sophia. Mommy and Daddy miss you more and more every day it seems like. Our love for you grows stronger every day as well! We wish you were here, little lady. 

The worst thing in the world is to have to bury your child. You don’t even have to have done that to know that it is. I’ve always known that from a young age. I would look at these parents and think “How in the world are they breathing?” I barely breathe now… and unless you’ve had to bury your child, you have no idea what this feels like. 

Tomorrow is Halloween… you should be a little Lion like your daddy was for his first Halloween. We should be doing things a lot differently… instead your crib is empty, our arms are void of your weight and we long for your physical presence. Mommy is dreading the holidays… because you’ll be spending all of these holidays in Heaven. The fourth of July was hard enough but, these are coming and they’re so much worse. Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years; we were supposed to do all of these firsts together, Sophia. I’m not sure what I’m going to do… 

Today is a very hard day in and of itself; you’re four months old and tomorrow we should be dressing you up and taking you to all of your grandparent’s houses and famity members houses “trick or treating”. It’s all crashing down… I love you, Sophia Samantha, and I miss you so much.

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